The Inner Storm

24 Apr 2022 | Humankind | 0 comments

I am a ghost  who walks alone.

Beyond my yard are high stone walls.

I walk and move and speak with calm.

But let me tell you this my friends;

Beneath the smile, the wave, the nod

There screams an inner storm.

It roars and wails and tears its hair.

It pours in torrents through my soul,

But God so stands that I may smile,

And damn this thing which drives me on.

I move and walk and speak with calm;

The inner storm whips on,

The silent storm that none must know;

The raving past, the hopeless now.

Reach out your hand and drag me in

Out of the screaming, beating waves,

Nor let me sink beneath the veil;

The fierce and raging storm.

O God above:

Look down on us and let them know to still the storm,

And by their efforts bold, erase

Despair and wrath and gnashing teeth,

And lead us out from dangerous dark

Into a sunlit place.

 

Charlotte T. Phillips, The  Inner Storm, Los Angeles, 1960.

Notes from the Compiler

I remember Charlotte, who I visited 65 years ago in Rancho Los Amigos Hospital, California. I have never forgotten the way she felt imprisoned by the 'inner storm' within her, which she could not escape. I cannot help thinking of the demon-possessed man in the gospel who looked to Jesus for an escape, and found it. Only to be told by Jesus: "Go home to your friends and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and what mercy he has shown you."' (Mark 5:8 and 19). Without having had the same traumatic experience as 'Legion' in the Bible, or 'Charlotte' in hospital, I can nevertheless tell my own story of how Jesus delivered me, as a young boy, from being enthralled by 'myself', and how he called me to tell 'how much the Lord has done for you.' The good news continues to be of escape: from one's self and a call to share the good news.

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